……iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit’s HUMP DAY!!!
Oh, shit! No it’s not…it’s only Monday! But never fear. It IS a super-duper, grand mochaccino day here at ChickSwagger…
We’re turning 100!
100-POSTS-old, that is!
And we couldn’t have done it without you! So we wanna celebrate with FREE BOOKS! And not just any free books…our hot CHICK’S free books! (Thanks Misty, Vonnie and Susannah!!)
But first, of course, we’re going to throw around some fun facts about… S.E.X.! (yeah…you guessed it!)
Josie here…MC’ing the festivites…Misty and Vonnie on internet research, Rachael on production, Renee and Susannah on props and…
(Josie glances around to be sure no one is listening in…)…stunt work. (Oh, sorry Renee and Susannah….was I not supposed to say that?)
LET’S TALK ABOUT SEX, BA-BY… (Josie’s awesome singing voice here…Misty’s not singing cause she’s still giggling about bananas…)
1. Helps keep your immune system humming
2.Boost libido. Yep, having sex keeps your sex drive in gear.
3. Improves women’s bladder control (kegels, girls! they help with the big ‘O’ too)
4. Lowers your blood pressure
5. Counts as exercise (undressing – 8cals, message – 80+cals/hour, sex-144+cals/half hour, oral sex – 100 cals/half hour, making out – 238 cals/half hour) The hell with the treadmill! (snicker, snicker!)
(ooooh, sorry…wrong pic….)
That’s better…Now THIS is an exercise machine!
Let’s continue…..
6. Lowers heart attack risk
7. Lessens pain
8. Makes prostate cancer less likely—A study found that men who ejaculated 13 to 20 times monthly presented a 14% lower risk of prostate cancer than men who ejaculated on average between 4 and 7 times monthly for most of their adult life.
9. Improves sleep
10. Eases stress
11. Eases depression
12. Heals wounds
13. Fights aging
14. Lowers breast cancer risk
15. Prevents vaginal dryness—and the pain that comes with it
16. Makes hair shine (good for holding on too!)
17. Makes skin softer
18. Cleanses the skin pores, making the skin brighter and decreasing the risk of developing dermatitis
19. Strengthens our muscles
20. High sexual activity makes the body release more pheromones—chemicals that attract the opposite sex
21. Enhances our sense of smell
22. More sex = less visits to dentist. Kissing stimulates salivation, which cleanses food left between the teeth and lowers the acidity in the mouth, the main cause of the tooth decay.
23. Drops the cholesterol level, balancing the ratio of good cholesterol to bad cholesterol
24. Hormones released while we have sex helps both men and women; estrogen protects a woman’s heart but on the long term, it can be efficient also against Alzheimer’s disease and osteoporosis while testosterone strengthens the bones and muscles.
25. Sexual activity lowers the risk of getting colds and the flu. Intercourse 1-2 times weekly means 30 % higher levels of the antibody immunoglobulin A, that spurs the immune system.
26. Boosts fertility—studies have found that the more often you make love, the better quality your sperm will be
27. Thirty minutes of vigorous sex burns up to 100 calories, which is the same as a small glass of wine (Tell your sig-other for every glass of wine, you NEEDan orgasm! It’s only fair…)
28. Improves self esteem
29. Cures headaches
30. Strengthens bones
BIG deep breath here…..
Now for the fUN stats!
31. There are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day.
32. The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation. (That sucks…oh, shit! Which head??? And how the hell do they find out?)
33. On average, it takes two tablespoons of blood to get a man’s penis erect.
34. The G-spot, a sensitive area located inside the vagina on the upper wall, an inch or two behind the back of the pubic bone, is named for <–Dr. Ernest Grafenberg
35. In the Aztec culture avocados were considered so sexually powerful, virgins were restricted from contact with them.
36. The vagina and the eye are self-cleaning organs.
37. Historical records show that even in 1850, women attempted to practice birth control. The most common method was a mixture of crocodile dung and honey placed in the vagina in the hopes of preventing pregnancy. (There goes my morning yogurt….Blech…)
38. For every ‘normal’ webpage, there are five porn pages.
39. Sex is biochemically no different from eating large quantities of chocolate.
40. A man’s beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex. (No wonder Mr. M shaves everyday!…his beard AND his head!! (He thinks his scalp needs to breathe…strange man…))
41. Women who read romance novels have sex twice as often as those who don’t. (This is SOOOO freakin’ true! Mr. M. is a freq flyer at the book store! He uses books as an aphrodesiac for me!!! The staff knows way too much about our sex life!)
42. <—-“Ithyphallophobia” – Noun; the morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis. ( Lucky this for us gals it’s a big ‘ole stretch to see the or we’d be DX’d with Ithyva-jay-jayphobia!)
43. “Formicophilia” – Noun; the fetish for having small insects crawl on your genitals. (Who makes this shit up? Hey…pubic lice are people too ya know!Gross!)
44. In earlier times, masturbation was believed to lead to blindness, madness, sudden death and other unpleasant diseases. Present research, however, shows no connection. (Thanks for the heads-up!)
45. A man will ejaculate approximately 18 quarts of semen, containing half a trillion sperm, in his lifetime.
46. The Geisha of Japan would not perform fellatio because it was considered demeaning for the cultured to do so.
47 The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone. (Go Wilma! Go Wilma!….)
48. A medical study conducted in Pennsylvania showed that people who have sex once or twice a week have their immune systems boosted slightly.
49. During the 1920s, it was believed that jazz music caused one to permanately lose his sexual inhibitions. It was often banned in many cities. One private company went as far as to sell the elites “jazz proof” furniture.
50. The earliest known illustration of a man using a condom during sexual intercourse is painted on the wall of a cave in France. It is dated between 12,000 and 15,000 years old.
51. According to a survey of sex shop owners, cherry is the most popular flavor of edible underwear. Chocolate is the least popular.
52. Viagra was released in 1998 with over $411 million in profits within its first three months.
53. It takes sperm about 48 hours to move up the vaginal canal, through the cervix, and into the fallopian tube where fertilization begins.
54. A lot of sex can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.
55. When surveyed, it was found that 20 per cent of men and 13 per cent of women have had sex in the workplace (either with a co-worker or just simply in the workplace environment with someone).
56. In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time. (O.o Good thing they passed THAT law!)
57. Most men’s erections are five and a half to six inches long. Although men’s penis sizes tend to vary greatly when they’re soft, the smaller ones expand more when erect than the larger ones.
58. A study shows that 70 percent of married men and women masturbate despite the fact that they should be “getting it” more. (Sorry…but I can usually get the job done faster and more efficiently…I’m a busy girl, ya know!)
59. Minute quantities of over 30 different substances have been identified in human semen. These include nitrogen, fructose, lactic acid, ascorbic acid, inositol, cholesterol, glutathione, creatine, pyruvic acid, citric acid, sorbitol, urea, uric acid and Vitamin B12, along with various salts and enzymes.
60. Chocolate contains phenylethylamine, the same feel-good chemical responsible for the ecstatic high people experience through sexual attraction and love.
61. Women who have given birth have darker labia minora than women who haven’t.
62. The majority of women experience a peak in libido just before their period.
63. -321°F is the temperature at which sperm banks store donor semen. At this temperature, semen can be stored indefinitely.
64. The point at which the average man reaches his sexual peak is between the ages of 17 and 18. (Oh, for God’s sake…they’re babies!)
65. The earth could be re-populated to its current level using the number of sperm that could fit into an aspirin capsule.
66. A chicken egg could accommodate the number of female ova necessary to repopulate the earth to its present numbers.
67. White women are the most likely to engage in anal sex, particularly if they also have a college degree. (SNORT! I wonder how they collected THIS statistic!!)
68. A teaspoon of semen contains approximately 5 calories. (And PROTEIN!)
69. For both men and women, the heart rate averages 140 beats per minute at the point of orgasm.
70. The average woman will have sex more than 3,000 times over the course of her reproductive years.
71. Most men under 40 years of age can achieve an erection in less than 10 seconds.
72. When a man ejaculates, the initial spurt travels at 28 miles per hour—faster than the world record for the 100m sprint, which currently stands at 22.9 miles per hour.
73. In one hour, the average sperm can swim seven inches.
74. With nothing in its path, a penis can shoot semen anywhere from 12 to 24 inches.
75. The average adult testicle contains enough sperm to measure a quarter of a mile laid out end to end.
76. The testes increase in size by 50% when a man is sexually aroused.
77. 1 in 50 people claim to have had sex in an aeroplane.(Airplane…one of the most hysterical, dumb movies of ALL time!)
78. Greek couples have sex an average of 138 times a year—placing them at the top of the world sex league. (HEY!..I haven’t been invited to the world sex league…have you?) 79. Japanese couples have sex just 45 times a year, which puts them in last place.
80. 5% of adults have sex once a day. 20% have sex 3 – 4 times per week.
82. When sexually aroused, 60% of men get erect nipples.
83. Half of single women have sex by the third date.
85. Women over 40 years of age are more likely to masturbate than any other group.
86. There’s a direct link between how often a man has sex and his life expectancy.
87. According to experts, sex is about 10 times more effective as a tranquilizer than Valium.
88. Sex can relieve a headache—it releases the tension, which restricts blood vessels in the brain.
89. 44% of women find it impossible to enjoy sex with a man who is not their intellectual equal. Just 31% of men share this problem.
90. At any given time, 25% of people are daydreaming about sex.
91. The clitoris contains twice as many nerve fibres as the penis—a toe-curling 8,000.
92. Besides humans, bonobos (a type of chimp) and dolphins are the only animals that have sex for pleasure.
93. It tends to be easier for women to orgasm during ovulation than at any other time in their cycle.
94. The size of the vagina decreases by 30% as orgasm becomes imminent.
95. Inside the female body, sperm cells can survive for up to nine days.
96. The longer a man’s ring finger is compared to his index finger, the more testosterone he has.
97. The average aroused vagina is 4 inches long—shorter than the average erect penis, which measures in at 6 inches.
98. Men find women with enlarged pupils more sexually attractive.
99. It’s fun.
And our number one reason why we love sex is… *drum roll*…
100. It feels goooooooooood.
AND like candles on a cake, we’ve added one extra little tidbit … Dear friends, bacon-flavored lube is now on the market in case you just can’t get enough.
So there it is people….all the reasons you should be ‘doing it’…and often!
Now…to celebrate our 100th post, we are giving away copies of our very own Chick’s books! Thanks goes out to Misty, Vonnie, and Susannah! So let’s go, gang, we’re gonna choose random winners from all those who comment! The winners will be chosen on Wednesday! So join us and chime in on this exciting day!
We’d like know which of these is your favorite?
Thank you all who make Chickswagger a fun, exciting, special place to be!
We love you!
The Chicks — Misty, Josie, Rachael, Renee, Vonnie, Susannah and Angie
